Not The Only One
by psycho-girl101
Summary: Sometimes grief wraps itself round your heart, you eyes, your mind, so tightly you are blind to everyone else's suffering. warning for suicide attempt.


_Okay I know, I'm a bitch with an obsession with suicide attempts, but that's only because I've made several myself and had help with it. Now, instead of trying again myself, I write it down. Is that not better?_

**Erm I'd like to dedicate this one to...my knees, I'll miss them when they're gone :)**

_Not the only one..._

"Harry, mate open this door or I'll knock it down!" Ron bellowed, thumping on a dark blue front door that lead to the basement flat of his best friend Harry Potter. Ron wasn't worried; he was petrified. No one had seen Harry for two weeks; or rather since the funeral. Harry could be dead for all Ron knew. What he did know however was that he couldn't lose another so close to him. There was no answer so he did just what he had threatened. He placed his shoulder against the door (magic forgotten entirely) and rammed it. It took a couple of attempts but the door's hinges soon gave out and it was sent crashing down the stairs it had concealed. It was probably a good thing he had forgotten about his wand as it would look pretty odd if an eighteen year old was seen standing on a door step waving a stick in muggle London. Ron speed past the door , leaping the bottom five steps and hurtled into the small but chic open plan kitchen. It was obvious to Ron that no one was there immediately. The flat was deadly silent, not even a dripping tap or buzzing fly. He walked slowly, breathing heavily from the adrenaline, into the living room and saw what he had feared the most. Harry was lying on the sofa; face down.. Ron nearly believed him to be merely sleeping until he caught glimpse of the empty pill jar and bottle of fire whiskey on the glass table.

"Shit," He whispered, the word catching in his throat. He jumped the coffee table, sending the bottle to the floor where it smashed, and turned Harry over. He felt for Harry's pulse, praying to anyone who might listen. Was that it? He couldn't be sure There it was again, that had to be a pulse. Finally remembering he was a wizard, Ron drew his wand and muttered _Enervate. _The tip of his wand glowed a pearly white colour and this light gradually spread to Harry's chest. Harry's eyelids fluttered and Ron released the breath he'd been holding ransom in his chest without knowing it. Harry choked and began coughing and spluttering, Ron helped him sit up and proceeded to thump him on the back. Harry stopped choking and opened his startling green eyes. Breathing heavily, Harry glared at Ron. Ron meet his stare defiantly. Harry groaned and rushed to the bathroom. Ron attempted to block the retching noises from his ears and focused instead upon the thought that he had reached Harry just in time, _**just in time**_What if next time he wasn't as lucky? Harry returned and slumped back on the sofa next to him, wincing slightly as he did so.

"What did you come here for?" Harry asked, his voice muffled because his head was buried in his hands.

"Because you're my best mate, and I was worried if that's all right," Ron replied stiffly, " Are you ok now?" Harry half nodded, " Good." Ron said and swiftly punched him in the side of the head, sending Harry reeling.

"What the hell was that for?" Harry yelled, picking himself up and flinging himself at Ron. Ron caught hold of both Harry's wrists (which were stick thin) and forced him to sit down. Harry was panting from the effort of just standing and submitted easily.

" When was the last time you ate?" Ron asked incredulously. Harry simply shrugged his shoulders. "Harry your killing yourself, but of course that's what you want isn't it?"

"Well what's the point in me sticking around? Nobody needs me anymore do they? I've lost everything, Ron, I don't want to be around to lose anymore." Harry replaced his glasses, his voice cracking slightly.

"What about me, mate, don't I matter? And what about mum? We've all lost someone you know," Ron explained carefully.

"But its never been your fault has it?" Harry asked dully, hot tears welling up in his eyes.

"Harry it wasn't your fault. Ginny knew exactly what could happen if she came with us, so did-" He broke off, it hurt too much to finish the sentence, " Look I miss her just as much as you do, she was my sister man,"

"But I was in love with her." Harry said savagely, thumping the arm of the sofa. Ron sighed and slumped back it the cool leather. Harry let out a frustrated sort of scream and ran both hands through his uncombed hair. His sleeves edged up his arms because there was nothing there to hold them down, revealing numerous ugly bruises and a multitude of cuts which Ron knew weren't from final battle; he thought it'd be best to not mention them however.

"I'm surprised Hermione isn't with you," Harry began finally, " surely she'd be out of hospital by now?"

"Harry she didn't-" Ron's voice cracked "-never mind, how about we get you something to eat,"

"Ron, I'm not hungry," Harry began.

"Don't give me that Harry, I've known you long enough to know when your lying,"

"Well maybe you don't know as much as you thought, otherwise you'd understand that I want you to just leave me alone!" Harry exclaimed.

"Maybe I'm just not taking your hint!"

"Then your thicker than I imagined possible!"

"Don't you have a go at me, I know your suffering but that doesn't give you the r-"

"Don't pretend you know what I'm feeling Ron, I was going to get married to her. Now she's gone!"

"Right that's it, get up!" Ron said standing up himself, Harry didn't move. " You need to see this, move!" Ron shouted losing control for a second. Harry glared at him for a moment before reluctantly complying. Ron took his arm and apparated away from the living room. The landed awkwardly somewhere Harry had vowed never to go again. The graveyard. The same graveyard where his parents, Sirius, Remus, Tonks and his fiancé were all buried.

"Why did you bring me here?" He asked Ron coldly but Ron had already set off up the well worn path, looking for one grave in particular. Harry followed him although he shook slightly from lack of energy.

They walked, or in Ron's case half-ran, in a stony silence, each lost in his personal thoughts. Finally Ron stopped beneath an old oak tree. Harry shuffled to a stop, panting slightly, beside him and gasped in horror as he followed Ron's gaze to the solitary, pure white plaque before them.

_Here lies Hermione Granger,_

_Beloved Daughter,_ _Fiancee and Child of the Lord._

_Too Good For This Life._


End file.
